My boyfriend have been dating 8 years
" And he normally makes a joke or pulls a jokey panicked face and the subject is quickly changed. This was the first time he'd half admitted being ready for marriage and I got my hopes up.
I really hate that Hollywood has pushed this idea that proposals are this magical thing that men spring on their girlfriends in a romantic surprise when in reality a proposal shouldn't happen unless both individuals have sat down and discussed their mutual desire to be married.
A responsible couple talks these sort of BIG life decisions out long before a proposal happens.
And in your mind that might "kill" the romance or your dream idea of how you'd be proposed to but this is reality girlfriend and it's better to be a responsible adult then a once upon a time princess.
From the sound of it he doesn't want to be married which leads me to believe that you either need to find satisfaction in the way things are now or come to terms with the possibility of your relationship ending.
It's 2018, plenty of couples don't get married now a days.