Obsessive compulsive dating
Initially, the patterns of ROCD might seem like simple insecurity in a relationship that will dissipate with time. Relationship OCD can seemingly create problems out of nowhere, but your misgivings can still be evaluated. Although it might seem counterintuitive, let your partner know what you're feeling.
ROCD, however, is characterized by a strengthening in response to time and the deepening of a relationship, and it often serves as a form of sabotage within an otherwise healthy partnership. If the answer to either of these questions is no, continue the next two steps. If you have a persistent feeling that something is not quite right with your partner, give yourself a time limit for falling down the rabbit hole, and see if you can find a legitimate reason. This may be difficult at first, but discussing your disorder with your partner can help your partner understand your unique needs and some of the behaviors associated with ROCD that they may have been blaming themselves for previously.
Many people experience the symptoms of ROCD without knowing the cause and are able to reach out to seek treatment and heal from this form of OCD that targets and often breaks down relationships.
One of the most common ways that people with ROCD stumble is through enabling behavior.
Some people with ROCD will have both focuses wherein they feel fear regarding both their relationship and their partner, and these fears compound to create a truly difficult relationship.
People who have both focuses might struggle to keep any long-term romantic relationships afloat and may experience even greater feelings of depression and anxiety than their counterparts who only have one of the ROCD focuses.
People with the disorder might regularly ask the people around them for reassurance regarding their relationship, ask their partner if they are truly "in" the relationship constantly, or may be plagued by doubts regarding the rightness of the relationship.
This can lead to endless cycles of drawing partners in and breaking up, or falling in love and reverting to only seeing their partners' flaws.People with undiagnosed ROCD may internalize their symptoms and feel as though something is wrong with them or that they are incapable of love, intimacy, or solid relationships.These people might engage in only passing relationships, avoid marriage, and avoid children, all to keep the anxiety and compulsions that arise in relationships in check.Over time, the lack of connection and intimacy can lead to a worsening of ROCD symptoms and can even result in additional diagnoses, such as depression.If you find yourself constantly comparing your partner to everyone around you, despite loving them deeply, or you find yourself wracked with doubt and confusion about a relationship you are otherwise happy to be in, you are not the only one.